How to change by not changing at all

Margaret Thatcher was the UK’s Prime Minister from 1979–1990. In her party’s October 1980 conference, she said: “You turn if you want to. The lady’s not for turning!” She was hitting back at those who wanted to force her hand, to get her to change her mind. She stood firm, despite the concern that the policies she advocated might negatively impact the economy and peoples’ livelihoods.

Today I want to do the opposite of a “Maggie.” I want to announce a wholehearted, complete and utter U-turn. This lady is definitely for turning. So, what’s prompting my public about-turn? I’ve changed my mind and I want to share why.

A few weeks ago, I wrote a blog about the paradox of choice. In lockdown I’ve been staying close to home and in blogging I’m staying close to my topics. I’m moving sideways from a paradox of choice to a paradox of change. We don’t need to travel far to see things differently: a topic Xavier de Maistre wrote about in 1794 in “Voyage autour de ma chambre” (Voyage around my room).

On my own meandering journey through the landscape of the internet I came across a psychotherapist called Simon Stafford Townsend. He writes about Gestalt psychotherapy and its central ideas. I found his style welcoming and easy and wound-up reading all of his website in one go. One of the things that stood out was his explanation on the paradox…